No one was safe in Sunday’s episode of Game of Thrones. “I choose violence” was the slogan for this week’s episode of Thrones. It was practically the only theme in “No One”, granted there were a few clips of comic relief courtesy of Tyrion and Bronn. Tyrion also let us in on what he wants to be when he grows up; a vineyard owner. His wine would be called The Imp’s Delight. Who wouldn’t buy that? HBO if you are not already on this, first off shame on you and secondly give me a call and we’ll get this ball rolling.

*** Stop right here if you have not seen Sunday’s episode. I mean unless you like spoilers…***

Heads were rolling freely in this week’s Thrones. The Clegane brothers were both back in action, slaying the day away. The Hound chose to use an axe to brutalize and decapitate his enemies while his brother, The Mountain, opted to use his bare hands, which was freaking awesome by the way!

Back in Braavos Arya weak and bleeding, made her way back to Lady Crane who helped heal Arya’s wounds. Unfortunately this would prove to be fatal for the Lady as she is murdered by Waif mere hours after dressing Arya’s wounds. Arya and Waif then play a short game of cat and mouse only for Arya to kill her and walk away victorious. Arya then heads back to the House of Black and White and confronts Jaqen H’ghar where she learns she has finally become no one. She turns the table on Jaqen H’ghar and tells him she is not no one. She is Arya Stark from Winterfell and she is going home.

Speaking of going home, Lord Varys sets sail for Westeros and Daenerys returns to Mereen just in the nick of time. The masters have sailed to Mereen to reclaim their slaves, burning down everything in their path.

At King’s Landing King Tommen delivers the biggest slap in the face to his own mother by banishing trail by combat, calling the practice barbaric and cowardly. Instead he informs Cersei and everyone else in the room that Cersei and Lancel will stand trial by seven septums like how it was back in the olden days.

Cersei’s face after hearing the announcement:

via GIPHY

Riverrun was no walk in the park either. #pooredmure

As predicted Edmure regained control of The Castle at Riverrun and ordered his men to stand down. This did not sit well with Blackfish, who according to one of Jamie’s men, died fighting. As we all know well by now, if a character is not killed on screen then there is a chance that character is not actually dead. Only time will tell.

Podrick and Brienne also join the ranks at Riverrun. Podrick received some fighting lessons from Bronn while Brienne shared some sweet moments with Jamie. In hopes to not have to battle Jamie and defend Sansa’s kin, Brienne attempted to persuade Blackfish to hand over the castle to Jamie. He flat out refuses but helps ensure that Podrick and Brienne are able to escape the castle safely.

Next on Game of Thrones:

Jon and his army take on the Bolton’s to regain the North.

Can you believe there are only two episodes left? Where does the time go?

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*** Stop right here if you have not seen Sunday’s episode. MAJOR SPOILERS, OBVIOUSLY***

Uncle Benjen Stark is back from his long walk and no longer M.I.A. He was summoned by the Three-Eyed Raven aka Bran, but how? Do these mystical powers run in the Stark family or is Benjen somehow linked to the Three-Eyed Raven because The Children saved him from turning into a White Walker? What else was good ole Ben up to this whole time? Will he be the one to train Bran and prepare him for the ultimate battle against The Night’s King and his army? So many questions and not enough answers.

Holy awkward family reunion. Poor Sam and Gilly. Not only did his father, Randyll Tarly, talk down to his eldest son but also verbally abused Gilly right in front of the whole family. Gilly’s pride in Sam’s accomplishments were no match for his father’s disappointment and borderline hate for his son. However, Sam’s mother took action, sticking up for her dearest Sam and escorting the women from the table. Randyll then told Sam he had until first light to leave his home, but the baby and Gilly would be taken care of. After Gilly expressed to Sam that he is nothing like his father says, it ignites a fire in him. He decides to take action grabbing his family and his father’s sheath and leaves his family’s estate.

Back at The House of Black and White, Arya Stark is once again faced with the task of poisoning Lady Karen. She does pour the poison into her rum but just in the nick of time returns to smash it out of her hand and lets Lady Karen know her fellow actress is out to get her. Unfortunately for Arya, this proved to be a grave mistake. Waif is now tasked with killing Arya. Thankfully Arya dug up needle before going to sleep. She better sleep with one eye open if she knows what is good for her.

The Lannister and Tyrell plot to take down The High Sparrow and regain Margaery and Loras Tyrell was foiled by none other than Tommen Baratheon himself. Young Tommen declared his devotion to serve the Seven Gods and in exchange Margaery did not have to take the walk of atonement. To add insult to injury, the King then removed his own father, Jamie Lannister, from the Kings Guard and banished him from King’s Landing.

Speaking of releases from prison, another Stark uncle returns to the screen. Lord Edmure Tully is released by Walder Frey in hopes to regain Riverrun from Blackfish. For those that don’t remember, Edmure married one of Frey’s daughters during the “Red Wedding” and as the heir to Riverrun, can put House of Frey back in control of said castle. Pitting brother against brother may not be the best course of action, but it seems Edmure may be inclined to lean more toward helping the Frey’s in fear of being on the receiving end of more torture. We shall see.

Once again Daenerys is on the road back to Mereen and plotting a course to Westeros.  She and Daario determine that they will need at least 1,000 ships to get the Queen and her army of Khal to Westeros. Euron Greyjoy is jumping up and down somewhere in the distance. Drogon, who really needs to stop growing or he may obliterate GOT’s VFX budget, returns to his mother, which in turn fires up the Khal to follow their Khalessi into a war to regain the iron throne.

However, there is a bigger war coming. Time to stock up on the obsidian (dragons glass) and prepare for the epic showdown between the Three-Eyed Raven and the Night’s King and his army of White Walkers. Will we see this showdown this season? Probably not, but one can dream.

Next Week:

Jamie meets Blackfish

Olenna Tyrell and Cersei face off…. Again

Jon and Sansa make moves

Yara and Theon plot to take back the Iron Islands

The Wildlings join Jon’s quest to take back The North

Davos Seaworth knows what’s up… The Dead are coming

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It’s official. The wait is finally over! Only mere hours ago season 6 of Game of Thrones premiered. The episode titled, The Red Woman.

*** Stop right here if you have not seen tonight’s episode. MAJOR SPOILERS LIE AHEAD ***

Picking up right where we left off last season, we momentarily gaze upon Jon Snow’s cold, dead body, moments before Davos Seaworth is alerted by Ghost’s barking to the tragic scene. Other members loyal to our former Lord and Commander come rushing to his side, vowing to take action against those who brought down our beloved Jon Snow. Grabbing Jon’s body they relocate him and Ghost into Davos’s holding and board up the room with their swords as their only defense.

Later in the episode we catch up with Sansa Stark and Theon Greyjoy who are on the run from Ramsey’s hunters and hounds. The two cross a practically frozen river and seek shelter under a toppled-over tree only to be tracked by Ramsey’s hunters and hounds. As they are about to be captured Brienne of Tarth and Podrick come to their rescue, slaughtering everyone in sight. Brienne once again swears her loyalty to Sansa who accepts.

Sansa & Theon crossing a freezing river

Back in Dorne, Prince Doran Martell and his son, Trystane Martell are brutally murdered by Ellaria, Obara, Tyene and Nymeria Sand. At least Trystane’s death was quicker than his father’s; he took a spear through the skull while his father bled out from being stabbed in the chest. Myrcella’s corpse (killed via poison on her way back from Dorne) and Jamie arrive back in King’s Landing, greeted by a broken down and beaten Cersei.

Cersei’s downward spiral of shame and guilt continues with the news of her daughter’s death. She feels as though she has failed, in her words, her perfectly, pure daughter. Everything has been taken from her and she lets Jamie know that this was all foreseen in a prophecy a witch told her long ago. Jamie comforts Cersei and vows revenge on all who have wronged the Lannister’s.

On the other side of Westerns, Jorah and Daairo set out to find Daenerys and discover she has been taken by a Khalassar. Daenerys is captured by another Khal group and momentarily becomes their slave until she reveals she was married to Khal Drago. Khal Moro, the leader of this pack, says no one will harm her but she must go to where the other Khal widows are to live out her days; The Temple of the Dosh Khaleen (Vaes Dothrak).

In this episode we also catch a glimpse of Arya Stark. She is a blind peddler on the streets but is still being trained by Waif. If you call beating a blind, defenseless girl with a stick, training. We also catch up with Tyrion and Lord Varys who are busy trying to figure out who is calling the shots for the gold faces. As they are walking the streets of Meereen we see a shot of someone spying on their conversation before all of the city’s ships are burned to a crisp.

Although the first half of this episode felt like it flew by because of all the cuts to different locations, the pace of the second half slowed down just enough to uncover one of the most exciting story arcs of the episode. We jump back to Castle Black and discover Melisandre is actually a witch and not just some crazy woman! Say what? We watch as she undresses in front of a mirror. She then removes her necklace, the first time we see her do this on screen, and once it is removed she transforms into an old woman.

Questions we are left asking after this episode’s conclusion: Now that we have seen Melisandre’s true nature, can she actually rise Jon Snow from the dead? Will Brienne and company make it to Castle Black? And if they do, what lies in store for them? Who is burning the ships in Meereen and why? What exactly will Jamie do to exact his revenge? What will become of Dorne now that the Prince and his heir are dead?

Next week: Bran Stark makes an epic return to the series, after missing in action for a full season. Ramsey makes plans to storm the castle and Jamie is out for blood going straight for the High Sparrow. It also looks like we will see some dragon action next week (*jumps up and down like a 5 year old).

All that is missing is some White Walker action. Hopefully that will come soon enough.

Until next week friends.

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